How to Deal with Kids Pestering Their Parents for Stuff – I Want It Now !!

 “Mom, I want…”

 “Mom, please…”

 “Mom, my friend has it so can I have one…?”

Kids can be demanding.

Now, no one is throwing around blame here. They have yet to grasp that money doesn’t grow on trees – and let’s be realistic, they won’t be satisfied by choosing something at a Dollar Tree well into adulthood. Our kids see things, want them, and of course, their only route to procuring them is through us as parents.

It’s referred to as “pester power“, and yikes it can have a grating impact. A trip through the grocery store becomes an exercise in how many different ways you can say no, but that’s just the start of it. By far the worst is the gadgets. Our kids are digital natives, so they see a screen, and they want it. Even if they already have it, they then want the upgrade when it comes along.

So how to handle it? If you’re still scrabbling around and have yet to find that Dollar Tree that must exist, you’ve got three different options.

Option One: Give In

We all make this choice from time to time. We’re tired, overrun with work and hallucinating about a bottle of wine and five minutes to ourselves. It’s what makes agree to the candy from the grocery store or the small gadget that we know will barely get any use. We want a moment of peace and to see our child happy, so we concur to their request.

In some ways, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. Anyone who grew up with a strict authoritarian parent will not want to do the same, and having a little leeway is a good idea. However, it’s something you have to build into your budget. If you have to go into debt to settle their urge, then it’s not worth it.

Option Two: Compromise

It might seem strange to bargain with a child, but it’s a skill they’re going to need to learn. You can teach them about prioritizing, all while buying you a little bit of time to do your research. If you buy on impulse, then you’re unlikely to be checking for deals, but if you have a little space then research goes a long way.

For example, rather than paying full price search online for discounts and coupon codes. Something like Paytm offers can make life more affordable. Your mantra is to never pay retail! And to take your time with the purchase to make sure it’s even something they really want.

Option Three: Make Them Earn It

Best used for items you’re going to need awhile to save up for – make your child do the same but in good behavior. An A on a report card earns a credit; cleaning the bathroom earns a credit; sweeping the leaves earns a credit. They need 10, 20, 50 or 100 credits (depending on the purchase price) to “earn” their item. The benefit here is you get some chores taken care of, and it’s a real test of how much they actually want that item they can’t live without.

Option Four: Put It On A Wish List

This is working extremely well for us right now. Each time they ask for something I add it to a list of theirs in my phone. Our plan is to sit down before their next birthday and review the list, research each item and prioritize. We’ll explain to them that we can’t have it all so their most favorite items so be at the top of the list. I do hope this will set the stage for them to manage their own money one day and also make them feel heard, as though they have the ultimate say on getting what’s most important to them.